The Rebirth :)

I haven’t written in a long time. No scratch that. I have written, I just haven’t shared. I have a whole folder of written blog posts gathering dust (not literally of course). I am my own worst critic I think. That is why I never share the things I write. Or maybe it is just the fear of being judged. Or the fear of letting people/strangers into my space.

I was reading a friend’s blog today and just felt inspired to write something. May be this will be the rebirth of my blog. It has long lay abandoned. Today we dust it off and see how it goes. Let us go on this journey together.

PS: Thanks Conrad

Until next time…..

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Hair Tales….

I am blessed with beautiful dark thick long glorious hair that grows like it is on steroids. I thank the heavens everyday for it.  And the father and his ancestors obviously…. They passed down the good hair gene so yours truly could be the envy of every girl. But then again it is just hair. I have met ladies with longer thicker healthier hair than mine. We exchange hair tips,  I secretly wish my hair looked as great and resolve to take better care it. <That resolve usually doesn’t last…. old habits>. I have also had the strangest conversations with strangers about my hair. This blog is dedicated to letting you in on a few of them.

Sort of Conversation one:

Me: *feels  hands poking at my scalp*. I do the obvious thing and turn around.

Stranger: *smiles sheepishly*. I was seeing if your hair was real.

Side Note: Apparently some people think it is perfectly acceptable to go poking at stranger’s scalps.

Conversation two:

I am seated in a taxi. Two ladies board the same taxi and seat behind me. The following conversation ensues.

Lady 1: Is that her real hair??

Lady2 : No way, Ekyo kiwani nawe.

Lady 1: But nga it looks soo real. Kale it might be real.

Lady 2: leeka nawe. Tekisoboka.  

 <Long argument ensues>

Finally…….

Lady 1 taps me on the shoulder and asks,

Lady 1: Wama is that your real hair??

Me: Yes it is.

Lady 1: are you sure??

Me : Yes. *Sarcastically* would you like to touch and confirm??

Lady 1 goes ahead to feel my scalp to make sure there are no biwani.

Conversation 3:

I am walking along the Ntinda streets. A lady stops me:

Lady: Hello, what retouch do you use?

Me: *Completely caught off guard * Huh ??

Lady: For your hair, what retouch bizigo do you use??

Me: Finally understanding. Ohhh…… Sometimes TCB, Sometimes Miadi.

Lady: ehhh…. Olina enviri  *walks away.

Side note: I have had that same conversation in different variations. From what hair oil I use, to what treatment I use. People all these hair products don’t work miracles, they work with what you have and either enhance it a little or if you are unlucky make it worse. So applying the hair oil I use will not make the hair follicles on your scalp triple in number or triple its growth rate. I think it is important that we learn to accept and work with what we have as opposed to trying to be like someone else. Sometimes I wish I had softer and not so thick hair. It would be manageable in its natural state and I could maybe pull off the natural hair look <I am already picturing all the cool things I could do with it>. But try putting a comb through my natural hair…. it is a war zone up there, steel wool and lion’s mane come to mind.  That is how dreams are shuttered. So yes I treated it and it was one of the best decisions I ever made. It is manageable, it is beautiful and I can do all these other cool things with it. What is my point?? Treated, natural, find what works for you and rock it!!!!

Forgive the rant, back to our selection of Convos.

Conversation 4:

I am perusing the aisles of certain supermarket.

Lady : Is that a human hair weave?? Where did you buy it??

Me:  Huh??  *I have no idea what she is talking about.*

Lady: Your hair, is it a human hair weave?

Me:  No, this is my actual hair.

Lady: *With an I don’t believe you expression on her face* are you sure??

Me: Yes.

Lady: *Walks off angry. Probably furious I refused to divulge my non existent hair secrets*

Conversation 5:

I am having a conversation with gentleman X. He keeps stealing glances at my hair.

Him: Is all that your real hair??

Me: Yes.

Him: Can I touch it?

Me: *a little creeped out, but…* Yeah sure, go ahead.

Him: *Runs his fingers through the hair*

Me: *thinking*  does this guy have a hair fetish?

Until next time……

The 7 different ways of drying freshly washed socks on a school morning. #LydiaNamubiruChallenge

Lydia Namubiru, Hats off to you<insert hat emoji>. That blog post was totally inspired!!!!! I swear I can totally relate. Now your probably wondering who this Lydia Namubiru is and what blog post I am talking about. So here is the link http://lydianamubiru.blogspot.com/2015/03/an-ernest-appeal-to-people-of-my.html?m=1 go read it your self.

So in the same spirit; why do we say such things??? Anyway, moving swiftly on, I am taking on what I have now dubbed the #LydiaNamubiruChallenge. Here goes………

Banange singa I knew how to make Chaps… oh well *sigh

The 7 different ways of drying freshly washed socks on a school morning.

Iron them <insert that ka emoji that shows all pearly whites> Am not entirely sure of how that will go. But it should work in theory.

Wring them in a towel: Walahi I swear it works. It requires two people though. Each holding one end of the towel and well the rest is pretty obvious. Wring!!!

Microwave them maybe??? No??

Pass them over a hot sigiri (now am just throwing stuff out there).

I know i said 7 but I think am all out of ideas………… Help anyone???

Why All Men Cheat on Loyal Women – By Kevin Hart

Ladies, Y’all need to read this!!!! Same goes for the gentlemen!!!

teremity

When I confessed to my EX’s questioning of my fidelity over a year ago, all she could say was “wow”. She seemed very taken aback by my answer. So today, when I was asked ‘why men cheat’ by a young lady during a Public Speaking event, I was initial hesitant to share the full conversation me and my EX had about her suspicion of my lack of loyalty.

“Can you tell me why all men cheat on loyal Women?” a curly haired PreMed student asked me today, during my public speak to a room full of 300 Women. My response to her question was,

“Males cheat on loyal women to boost their ego. A woman can be perfect for him. Beautiful, career minded, own money, cooks, does whatever he wants her to do in bed, loyal, intelligent, educated, faithful and yet, he will still cheat on her with an ugly…

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Will the real writers please stand up!!!

This writing thing is not easy. A writer you say, no am no writer. I just put my thoughts down the best way I know how. Am not trying to win any awards or even get any recognition. This is just a hobby, something I do to blow off steam, an outlet… A place to put down all the stuff that is rambling around in my head-its chaos up there.

 Once in a while I do my rounds, check out other blogs(which by the way put mine to shame)beautifully written pieces that inspire and that I can aspire to. And then I come across some and think to myself why? why? why? would you make some one suffer through that!!! Granted no one is forcing you to read, but when you are a reader you tend to want to read anything you come across. Let me paint a picture,

*Starts reading xxxx’s blog. One line in, *gets dictionary, looks up meaning of word. Proceeds…, two words later *looks up meaning of another word. Proceeds…., three words later, *looks up meaning of yet another word. This goes on up until the end of the blog!!!

 Now I am no expert in writing, all I do is string words together and hope they sound good, I have a lot to learn and I hope to God, this blog does not lie in the aforementioned category. If it does, then by all means, hand me a gun and I will shoot myself in the head, if only to stop myself from subjecting people to my ramblings

 Back to my point, I am no writer but what I am is a reader. I love to read. The joy about reading is that it takes you on a journey and for a while you are immersed in this other reality, living vicariously through all these characters, getting lost in a beautifully written poem, experiencing what the writer is talking about, the anger,the joy,the frustrations….

 But how am I supposed to enjoy and get immersed in this journey if I am constantly being yanked out to refer to a dictionary? We get it!!! your vocabulary is full of big, bite-your-tongue-trying-to-pronounce words. Craming five big words in a sentence, does not make you any better of a writer!!! All it does is annoy the person reading. What makes a beautiful piece of writing is the simplicity(emphasis on simplicity) with which the words flow, not how many big pompous sounding words you can manage to cram in there.

 Am writing this for all the avid readers like myself out there. Don’t take away our joy, don’t take the fun out of reading. Allow us our mini adventures…. If you have been writing with a dictionary next to you, trying to impress us with your big words, close that dictionary and get back to the drawing board. Get back to the basics, to the reason why you started writing in the first place.

 Yes… I do see the irony – Critiquing writers in a written blog

 Until next time…..

Experiencing Joy…. In its entirerity :) :)

This is a happy blog….. Yes I am happy… ecstatic even… But its not as much as happiness as it is Joy. I am absolutely filled with Joy. No I did not win the lottery or come into a million dollar inheritance…. neither have I met the man of my dreams…(yeah I had to slip that in somewhere). Infact nothing has changed… the same problems I had yesterday are still the same problems I have now… I use the word “problems” loosely… What has changed however is my mindset. Therein lies my breakthrough.

 

A series of events led me to this point (I will not go into detail). I didn’t even know I was searching for something until I found it…

 Anyway back to the reason why I am filled with Joy… I have been praying about something for a couple of months now… There were bouts of depression, crying to God and wondering why he was not doing anything??? And then a week ago I got my answer… No I did not get what I was praying for.. so now your probably thinking she is crazy… who gets deliriously happy about an unanswered prayer… I am happy because I got something even better… I got the assurance that he has got my back.

 It was like something snapped into place and everything made sense.. I finally understood that I was trying so hard to control every aspect of my life… which led to frustration, depression, anger when things didn’t happen as I wanted… It was like God was telling me to let go…. and I was saying No God I can do this all on my own… I will bring you in when I am at my wits end.

I understood that he has got my back…. always has, always will. It is very easy to forget that, to forget all the amazing things he has done for you and focus on the one thing that is not going right. To think that its all on you,  that you have to fix everything that is not going right. You need to be reminded every so often that that too shall pass, and the God who had your back all the other times is right there waiting for you to let go and let Him take over…. Its not until you hand over the reigns that he can come in and amaze you yet again!!!

So yes I am happy not because my issues have magically disappeared but because I have let go, I have absolute faith in the fact that He will sort them out. I am free!!!! Free from worry, free from anxiety, free from the fear of what might happen because i know he will come through… It may not be as I had planned but I know he will!!!! And boy is that a load off!!!

A time might come when I forget this truth….I am after all human… I hope someone smacks me in the face and forces me to come back to this blog post!!! For now i choose to focus on all the amazing things in my life.. my family, my friends, my job and most of all my relationship with God 🙂 🙂

Until next time…..

*romans 8:28, phillipians 4:6-8, Ephesians 3:20-21, John 16:33

Growing Up!!!!

In my head… this was a pretty good idea… start a blog… write about all the little things that inspire me, annoy me, make me all mushy inside, make me think. Generally a place to put my thoughts down..  Now that would have worked if only i could zero in and stick to one particular train of thought….. Anyway clearly that is not happening… so here goes a bunch of random thoughts…

What’s with everyone i know getting married, engaged and having babies…. i feel like a missed the memo or something. Every day comes with a new text message that goes something like this “<insert name here> and <insert name here> invite you for their  1st wedding meeting” and every weekend brings with it the daunting task of finding what to wear(thank God for sisters with whom you conveniently share a dress size 🙂 ). 

And then at the wedding/kwanjula/give-away ceremony, there is that <………>(take your pick, <uncle, Antie, senga, complete stranger>) that  will ask you uncomfortable questions like…. “anha.. when do we get to attend yours???”

My thoughts on this were “ARE YOU CRAZY???” All that responsibility… at this age, am too young to be someone’s wife. What do I even know about marriage??… Isn’t marriage something grownups would do….

And then the realisation slowly dawned on me… Your not a child any more!!!! You are actually not a child anymore!!! It is time to forge your own path, to take charge of your life . You can no longer depend on mummy and daddy to make it all better and make all the tough decisions for you..

Yes we deceive ourselves into believing that once we are at campus, we have grown up, we don’t need the parents any more… but in reality the actual growing up, i believe, is a state of mind!!!! And it happens differently for everyone. Which is why in one corner you will have a 30 year old gentleman still leaving in his parents house, still asking mummy for offertory money<ok that is a bit of an exaggeration(and i hope to God there is no such gentelman)… but you get the point >  and in another corner you have another 30 year old gentelman working his way to an early retirement, with several accomplishments to his name and just so there is no confusion, NOT still leaving with his parents!!!

After that realisation, I can confidently say I have grown up and actually mean it. I have a new outlook on life. Things like marriage no longer seem like stuff grown ups do… It is stuff that i can do!!! I no longer think that the parents have all the answers…. I actually have them too. And yes i will always need them(that will never change), but i now know i can take care of myself!!! Yes I don’t have it all figured out…. but that is the beauty of growing up….. Knowing you can handle whatever is thrown at you!!!

I started this off having no idea where i was going with it, thinking it was going to be a bunch of random thoughts…. well….. apparently my subconscious had other plans……

Until next time……..